When people start out chasing their dreams, most of them do it passionately and full of motivation, at least for a while, but often when the first thrill of excitement is waning and things get hard the motivation drops. At that point there are people who give up and there are people who push through and get things done.

The latter are willing to achieve their goal no matter what. They seem to become the successful and happy people, but as usual nothing is what it seems. Because a lot of those people become hooked to the productivity of success and vice versa.

They get absorbed and swallowed by the need for being productive. Productivity becomes number one on their list and everything else second. And “second” often means it doesn’t get on the list at all, because productivity always keeps calling first.

The problem is that productivity never stops. If you reached your goal there will always be a next goal, and a next, and a next. Life changes and you’re wishes for where you want to be, what you want to get done, and what you want to achieve will always carry on.

The tricky and often unnoticed part is that life doesn’t wait for you. It just slips by. Before you know it you’ll be 30, 40, 50, 60 and 70. And have you then really enjoyed life to the fullest?

Have you made sure you that you took some time to relax, and listen to the birds sing, enjoyed a conversation with your kids, your partner and friends each and every day?

Have you enjoyed running, cycling, yoga or working out? Meditating in silence, playing guitar or piano? Did you take the time to do some of those things each week? Or have you been mainly productive to achieve more financial success each and everyday?

Of course, money is important to a certain degree. You need to be able to support yourself and your family. Some luxury is nice and not necessarily a bad thing, but when making money for luxury gets in the way of living fully and appreciating the little things in life each and every day, you are letting life slip through your fingers.

You keep thinking you’re doing it to secure your future, but you’ll never reach your future. It’s always ahead, and it will always feel that way. At the same time your future is passing you by as you keep being productive. More of your future will be left behind in the past and you can’t retrieve it.

So how do you reach your goals without becoming a slave of productivity while keep enjoying the good things in life?
Continue Reading

Sometimes when things get hard, when people get annoying and under your skin, it is easier to behave reactively. It’s an ugly demeanor. You use reactive language towards your spouse, your children, your parents, your friends and strangers.

It’s the moment you see or hear something that you don’t like but you aren’t willing to do something constructively about it (it seems as if you’re helpless). It’s a fixed mindset of “I can’t”, “I don’t”, “Yeah but”. You want others to solve the problem, because you feel you are not responsible for it.

You think it’s the only way out, but it often isn’t and it always gets backfired real quickly. Things always get worse from there.

Being reactive means others are running your agenda. You react to keep your head above the water but you have no control over what is happening. You feel overwhelmed and frustrated.

Proactivity
Being proactive is the exact opposite of being reactive. You choose to take responsibility, you deal with things in a proper manner and work on finding a solution in the most effective and harmonious way.

You behave calmly and kind, and open yourself to be flexible and resourceful under stress. Your values (positivity, self control, happiness, effectiveness, love, creativity, you name it) are the things that determine your actions and you are not lead by your emotions, your mood, or the behaviour of others.

You are letting go of the reactive person inside of you and take a moment to pause, breath and give room to your spirit, your life force and a new frame of mind.

It’s a skill you can develop and improve with practice.Continue Reading