Sometimes when things get hard, when people get annoying and under your skin, it is easier to behave reactively. It’s an ugly demeanor. You use reactive language towards your spouse, your children, your parents, your friends and strangers.
It’s the moment you see or hear something that you don’t like but you aren’t willing to do something constructively about it (it seems as if you’re helpless). It’s a fixed mindset of “I can’t”, “I don’t”, “Yeah but”. You want others to solve the problem, because you feel you are not responsible for it.
You think it’s the only way out, but it often isn’t and it always gets backfired real quickly. Things always get worse from there.
Being reactive means others are running your agenda. You react to keep your head above the water but you have no control over what is happening. You feel overwhelmed and frustrated.
Being proactive is the exact opposite of being reactive. You choose to take responsibility, you deal with things in a proper manner and work on finding a solution in the most effective and harmonious way.
You behave calmly and kind, and open yourself to be flexible and resourceful under stress. Your values (positivity, self control, happiness, effectiveness, love, creativity, you name it) are the things that determine your actions and you are not lead by your emotions, your mood, or the behaviour of others.
You are letting go of the reactive person inside of you and take a moment to pause, breath and give room to your spirit, your life force and a new frame of mind.
It’s a skill you can develop and improve with practice. You need to be observant, listening sincerely, keeping an open mind, thinking in possibilities and outside of the box, anticipating and acting towards the best possible outcome.
You also want to be ahead of bad situations that are reasonably predictable before they escalate. Look around you and read people’s faces, hear their words, watch their moods and energy levels. Foresee what is going to happen and be responsive ahead of time.
Once you’ve become proactive you feel more in control of your environment and your life. You play and work with whatever the universe puts in front of you. Although it takes sincere effort to handle a difficult situation, you will see it more as a welcoming challenge on your path.
You want to make sure your energy level is always up to the task. If you’re lacking vitality, reactivity sets in. So stay on top of that.
Proactivity is an attitude you can use in business and in your personal life, with colleagues, clients, your partner, your children, your friends and even strangers. Every person and every circumstance is an opportunity.
See proactivity as a game you can practice everyday in every situation and soon you will learn to crack the code, enjoy it and benefit from the fruits it will produce. Life will be more lighter and playful.
Start being proactive today!